It’s 1996. My son, Abe is in his highchair trying to keep his eyes closed and squinting through his eyelashes trying to see what we are doing. What are we doing? My husband and I are holding hands and having the moment of silent worship that starts every meal. Seeing Abe trying to participate but not knowing what we were doing led us to start singing the Johnny Appleseed grace at every meal, wherever we were. We wanted to include Abe in our practice of expressing gratitude for a meal.
It also started me on a quest to find ways to make our Quaker faith transparent to others. How many times have we welcomed someone to our meeting who found us on the internet? Between making a name tag and handing them a welcome packet, we have about 90 seconds to explain 400 years of Friends’ worship practices. Not possible.
I’ve spent time thinking about this over the years, especially when asked to give presentations.
I’m writing this to share some thoughts about what Quaker worship is and isn’t. I welcome others’ thoughts on this topic.
To begin, we gather to hear the “still small voice” within. Finding that place can offer comfort, peace, insight, wisdom and a resting place from the world’s noise. Our founder, George Fox, called this voice (among MANY other names he used) our Inner Teacher and identified it with Christ. Some contemporary Friends have moved away from Fox’s Christ centered language to make this Inner Teacher more inclusive and allow for its existence apart from theistic beliefs.
Some have asked, is it the same things as meditation? I don’t think so. For me, meditation is an exercise or a technique that I do on my own to improve my “antenna” for listening to the Divine.
Meeting for Worship is where I use that antenna in the company of others to access the Inner Teacher. For this reason, I do not meditate during meeting for worship.
Fox discovered that this Inner Teacher was more easily accessed when people gather in community. While we gather in community, we are free to think our own thoughts, receive our own insights and sometimes, share insights from our Inner Teacher as vocal ministry with those gathered. How do we know when a message is from this Inner Teacher and not simply our thoughts, or ego wanting to be heard? In three plus decades of worshiping in different meetings, and reading Quaker authors, I offer some commonly shared guideposts. These are often framed as questions (queries) to aid in our discernment.
1. Is this a message for me alone? It may be specific and/ or answers a direct concern for you. These are not typically shared as vocal ministry.
2. Is this something that is meant for me to think over and reflect on later, perhaps growing into a message at another time?
3. Am I responding to another’s message with my own thoughts? Friends typically do not argue, discuss or correct another message. Generally, we don’t respond to another’s message with thoughts that are the result of another’s vocal ministry. Sometimes several people may have messages on the same theme during worship, but this is seen as proof that the Inner Teacher is with us as a body.
4. Have I allowed enough silence between the last message and mine to allow Friends gathered to consider and reflect on the previous message? The silence after someone offers ministry is a rich opportunity to reflect on their message.
5. Am I speaking with a sense of humility, being faithful to what I feel led to share? Friends are urged to speak with economy of language and to speak only once in a meeting.
Like Abe, newcomers may feel that they are both trying to “get” what meeting is all about and find their own way into deeper worship. We welcome all into this unique and powerful form of worship. I hope this essay gives both newcomers and experienced Friends the confidence to offer vocal ministry when led.